As early learning professionals, we support children’s social and emotional development, so that when they transition out of our programs, they are prepared with the social-emotional skills that will enable them to build healthy relationships in kindergarten and elementary school. For that transition to occur successfully, children must have experience interacting and connecting with their peers.
Even at a very young age, children can demonstrate sensitivity and empathy, early social-emotional skills that continue to emerge naturally through children’s interactions with one another. In this article, we share three approaches early care & learning providers can use to help children form positive, healthy relationships.
Children learn what healthy relationships look like by watching the adults in their lives interact with each other. One of the best and simplest ways that we can help children is by ensuring that the words and tone of voice we use to communicate with others are kind and respectful. Children are keen observers, and they pick up on emotions and tone when adults communicate with one another. We can lead by example and show children what it looks like to be supportive, polite, honest, and helpful.
Modeling can also be incorporated into your conversations with each of the children in your program. When a child is sad, and you comfort them or use supportive language, both they and the other children who observe the interaction will learn from your example.
Unfortunately, modeling goes both ways. Children learn from positive examples, but can also pick up on negative interactions. If children regularly hear adults raising their voices or speaking with annoyance, they might try the same communication style to see if it works for them. This is why it is important for us to be thoughtful about the example we are setting for the children in our care.
A resource article from Zero to Three notes that “forming positive, healthy relationships depends on the ability to show feelings appropriately and to recognize the feelings of others.” We can teach children acceptable ways to vent anger, such as running in the yard, drawing an angry picture, or tossing a pillow on the floor.
We can also show children how to connect language with emotion in order to express their feelings. You might say, “You seem sad that it’s time for a nap, because you weren’t done playing”, or “I can see that you’re feeling angry right now.” Using this type of language will help children identify and be able to talk about their own feelings and those of others.
An important part of relationship-building is developing a foundation of respect and understanding for others. This comes from learning from a young age to not only accept or tolerate, but to embrace those who are different. When children are young, they are naturally curious about differences. Why does one child have different colored skin? Why does another child have two moms? Why does that child look different from me? Why does she still wear a diaper?
These questions are vital to children’s understanding of their community and how the world works. At a very early age, children are aware of the things that make us the same, as well as the things that make us different. It is important to teach children that we are each unique, and that is part of what makes friendships and relationships interesting and valuable. Maybe some of us are shy, while some of us are scared of the dark. But these unique qualities are the things that make us special. Children need to know that differences are the beauty of our community and our world.
These children’s books for infants, toddlers, and preschoolers will make Storytime an opportunity to celebrate diversity.
To create an inclusive classroom, take a look at the tips in the Good2Know article: Inclusive ECE Environments: Classroom Spaces that Welcome All Children.
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